Monday, July 23, 2012

Love Cherishes

Marriage is for Keeps

At the time I am writing this, my dear husband has been away for one week. He was supposed to be away a few days longer, but like the return of Jesus, my husband's return is imminent, as he will return today!! It is good to be away from each other occasionally as there is time to cherish the memory of the other, knowing that soon you will be together again.

Photo Credit: Haven of Rest

The word love in our language can hold a depth of meaning or expression of shallowness depending on the connotation. I love the word, cherish, although it is not used as often today. If I say that "I cherish my husband", it brings to mind an intimacy that saying "I love my husband" cannot convey.

Tonight, I want to show my husband ways that I cherish him. I have missed him!! I looked up 'cherish' in my favorite dictionary (Noah Webster's 1828) and here are ten actions that I found within the definition:

  1. To treat with tenderness 
  2. To show affection
  3. To give warmth
  4. To give ease or comfort
  5. To hold dear
  6. To embrace with affection
  7. To encourage
  8. To cherish the principles of virtue
  9. To treat in a manner to encourage growth 
  10. To give attendance and supply nourishment

I am not as young as I used to be (duh!!) and as I get older, so do the number of years that we are married. Have you noticed how many couples get divorced after 20, 30,or even 40 years?! That tells me something!! The statistics for Christian divorces are just about as high as the unsaved. It is such a shame. But, this tells me how important it is to cherish my husband and my marriage. 

1.  Cherishing my husband starts when I get up and have my Quiet Time. I cannot cherish him without spending the time with my precious Lord, or I'll fail. Without the indwelling of the Holy Spirit in my life, I am merely living in my own strength. Oh how often I have done that!

2.  The second thing that is important is making sure that I care for my body and keep myself looking my best. I remember being told this when I was first married. Making sure my hair is attractive (though graying, lol) and that I am dressed nicely (though casually) gives the overall aura of expectancy, being ready for his return from his day. 

3. The third thing is to have the house relatively picked up and clean. My husband gets home around supper time, so I am often at the sink washing be reasonable with yourself. Have a nice meal cooking and if you are running late, get the onions cooking as it gives the home a delicious aroma that provides an atmosphere of warmth and coming nourishment.

4.  Fourthly, let your words encourage and lift him up to a higher plain. Let your tone and words soften in tenderness. Do something to show affection in action or things you say. Make your bed welcoming by making it each day, turning down the sheets, and removing any extra pillows before he goes to sleep. My husband works so hard and is giving of his strength to supply for us and keep me keeping at home. He is so tired and worn out by the end of the day. Any little thing can help to soften the mood that might have become tarnished over the few years (or many) that you have been married.

Cherishing in our society is similar to what my husband does with his 20+ year old white Toyota Silica. He calls it his 'poor-man's sports car'. He has rebuilt the engine and keeps it shiny clean, but if it gets to the point that it starts to rust or the repairs are not worth the expense, he will no doubt sell it or take it to the junk-yard like other cars he has owned. 

When marriages rust out the relationship between the couple with words and illicit actions that tarnish; marriages are thrown away much like a car. Don't let your marriage get to that point and if it is nearing the point of no-return, start doing things to rebuild your relationship whether your feelings are in it or not. 

There is testimony after testimony of a marriage being renewed and the fires of love being kindled as just ONE, the wife or the husband, begins to cherish the other. That is why the book, The Love Dare, is such a good book that gives practical steps to do for 40 days to kindle or rekindle your marriage.

Tonight I am going to cherish my husband. I will look for his return in a similar way to the return of Christ my King. The king of our home will return and I want to be ready!! I am going to cook a delicious meal and show him that I cherish him as his absence has made me realize how much I cherish him.

 "What need does your husband have that you could meet today?
Can you run an errand: Give a back rub or foot massage"
Is there housework you could help with?
Choose a gesture that says,
"I cherish you"
and do it with a smile."
(The Love Dare, p. 53)

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  1. Beautiful post, Judith! To cherish is a wonderful and Godly idea, like "agape", self-sacrificing love (translated "charity" in the KJV). The perfect example of agape is Christ dying for us on the cross.
    May you have a blessed week in Him!

  2. I know that feeling of having your husband return from a time away. Michael used to be in the Army and he was often in the field or traveling with work. It really does make you appreciate your husband when he's away. All of your advice is good, Judith. Thanks for taking the time to write out these good reminders. Bless you,

  3. What a beautiful encouragement to love our husbands! This is especially important for when after the kids come. It is too easy for a young wife to ignore her husband and even an older wife whose kids are involved in sports and needing to be driven around, etc. The kids needs always seem to come first and poor dad is neglected. Not a good thing.

    We have to remember why we married him in the first place and work at our marriage instead of taking it (and him) for granted, so preach it, sister!

    Did I know you were a PK? I can't remember. My kids are PK's too and I am a PW, lol! So does that make my hubby just a P? Hahaha, he only gets on initial, lol!

    Thanks for linking up to Making Your Home Sing Monday!

  4. I think I write these things for myself, and should they help someone else, all the better. Thanks for your comment.

    Nan, you are too funny and so much so you had me laughing all by myself!! Yes, I think you would be a PW...but I am a MPK because I was a "missonary-pastor's kid" lol!!

  5. Judith...fabulous post dear friend! I love the word cherish and how it implies more than just loving someone. As our married years add up, I believe we have to be more intentional in cherishing our husbands. Sometimes, we can become too comfortable and forget. Thank you for the sweet encouragement and for sharing at WJIM this week.


If you have gone a little way ahead, O friend, call back --
Twill cheer my heart and help my feet along the stony track.


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