Monday, July 9, 2012

Love Makes Good Impressions: Greeting Your Husband

Marriage is for Keeps

As I walked across the long room where the mailboxes were in my college (quite a number of years ago ;-) a thrill would stir in my heart as I would see the white envelope with the red flap slanted across the width of the box.  Tim, would always use Snoopy stationary when he wrote, so I always could see right away that I had a letter!!

The days when we were preparing for marriage were the most exciting times of our lives. Everything in life came alive as if it depended on our love. 

Usually, before a couple is married, the guy wants to make a good impression on his girl. He takes her to interesting places and nice restaurants because, love makes good impressions. Too often, once that couple is married, in time, life settles into a routine and it is too easy to neglect our husband, especially once the children come along.

If you want your marriage to thrive through the years, you must invest in it for better or worse, richer or poorer, so that you have a special relationship that will last both of your lifetimes. My husband and I have been married for 33 years, and we are by no means the 'model' relationship. It isn't always easy. How about for you?

There have been many things that I did to keep the fires burning warmly in my marriage, but there have been many things that I neglected through the child-growing years. How much better those difficult days would have been if I had not neglected to greet my husband like I did when our romance was new!! This may seem inconsequential to you, but you will find surprising significance to this one small gesture.

Here are four ways to improve your relationship through greeting your husband:

  1. Greet my husband warmly when he comes home from work. I know about when my husband will arrive home from work. I need to be prepared to stop what I am doing and show him how important he is to me, show gratefulness for his hard work to support his family, and genuinely show affection toward him
  2. Speak kindly to your husband with a countenance and expression that conveys respect and honor.
  3. Be gracious and humble enough to address your husband with kindness even when communication between you is stained.
  4. Let the words to your husband: when you first wake up in the morning, when you are in the car with him, the energy in your voice on the phone, always convey that you are really, really glad to see or hear him.
I know many of you ladies are struggling day to day just with the daily routines of housework, homeschooling, finances (oh how finances can be difficult on a relationship!!), and just the basic needs and joys of family life. Don't ever give up!! 

The most important piece of advice I can give you is: always, always, always look to see what YOU did wrong instead of focusing on your husband. You will do more to change revitalize your marriage through allowing God to change YOU instead of YOU  trying to change your husband!!

Finally, brethren, 
whatsoever things are true, 
whatsoever things are honest, 
whatsoever things are just,
whatsoever things are pure,
whatsoever things are lovely, 
whatsoever things are of good report; 
if there be any virtue, 
and if there be any praise, 
think on these things.
~Philippians 4:8~

Think of a specific way you'd like to greet your spouse today.
Do it with a smile and with enthusiasm.
Then determine to change your greeting to reflect your love for them.
(The Love Dare-page 44)

Disclaimer: I have not arrived!! I still am learning to do all the things I have suggested in this post (and other posts) and find that writing these posts on Marriage is for Keeps does more to encourage me to love the wonderful husband that God has so graciously given me. 

In Christ Alone,

The Alabaster Jar


  1. I am often convicted of not stopping to properly greet my husband when he comes home- I'm usually caught up in dinner, cleaning, the children...etc. Thank you for another reminder.

  2. Replies
    1. Angela...I am much more purposeful about this but have learned from my mistakes.

      Simply Raising 8...thanks for following and so happy that you liked the post. I raised 7 and I know how easy it is to be so tired by the time my husband comes home. If I can encourage anyone else to realize helps to correct it. I want to sail smoothly into the empty nest :-)

  3. Very good advice in this post, Judith. Like you, I have not arrived either, but we both have weathered the storms and come away stronger, haven't we? Thanks for your godly tips. Bless you, Gail

  4. Excellent advice, Judith. So blessed you linked it up with The Alabaster Jar! Your post is a wonderful fit for Marital Oneness Mondays. Hope you join us again next week!

  5. Hi! I found you through Modest Mom...

    I love what you have written here; and I wish I had known this a long time ago. Though I do not believe it would have changed my current situation. I am going through a divorce due to reasons beyond my control. But... I believe God has something better in store for my children and myself. And should He see fit to bless me with another husband, this is something I am going to remember. I said this one someone else's blog the other day, and I mean it. I am gathering this information and, like Mary, I am tucking it all in my heart.

  6. "always look to see what YOU did wrong instead of focusing on your husband."

    Yes! This is so important and something that I continually need to work to improve.

  7. I am writing to remind and encourage myself just as much as others. Yes, Gail, I have weathered many storms, but the storms have mostly subsided. I am so thankful for that. I have learned much of what I know through those years raising children. I realize now, that many older Titus2 women learned their wisdom through their trials and victories. Some things they did successfully and other things they failed at. Some things I am still learning.

    Heather, I am sorry for what you are going through. It must be very painful for you and your children. Look to the Lord for His strength and seek Him with all your heart.

    Jenni, yes, we continually need to do our part and allow the Holy Spirit to live through us. If I (or you) are not continually working to improve we will stagnate and start relying on ourselves instead of seeing our need for the Lord.

    Thanks Ladies for joining in this conversation. I really appreciate every one of you!!

  8. This post is so rich of insightful advice. THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

    One of my goals that I have done purposefully and has almost become a habit is to smile EVERY time my husband (or one of the kids) come into the room. I mean, look them in the eye, find them and smile. It has made such a big difference.

    Wonderful pieces of advice here though, thanks. I've been to your site before and have always found it helpful. To me that means its time to start following!

    So, hello from your newest follower :)
    Patty from

  9. Judith, sweet friend, what a heart grabbing post. I, like you, have not arrived but I do strive to build on what I do well and work on those things I struggle with. Thank you for such encouragement and for sharing on WJIM.


If you have gone a little way ahead, O friend, call back --
Twill cheer my heart and help my feet along the stony track.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...